I’m enjoying a Sunday without work and the related stresses. Franky though, I can’t say I’m at all struggling there. I’m doing quite well, and going above and beyond in most respects. I do this for my own reasons, not because I’m expecting some sort of dividend from my investment. The market is respect and the currency is effort. I’m rising stock, if those metaphorical circumstances maintain. I’m really only encumbered with my laundry, which is now down to 1 measly load per week. Nice. Efficiency is at a premium. My life in the most external of parameters is good. Arguably, the more internal this look becomes, the more unsettled landscape there is to behold. I my emotional consistency is in a turbid state between resolve and longing. I find no solace in others right now. There are hardly any who have garnered my respect, or would even know what to do with my respect if they had it.
It makes me stop and think that my little Fantasy Football League might be doomed because 3 of the people in it come from the stock of delinquent, giggly trainees. I think that even if they lose their jobs, nothing is preventing them from participating in the league. If they flake out entirely, I’ll find someone to replace them with before we draft. But other than that, I really have no acute worries. My bank account continues to go up as I get paid and don’t spend anything. I have enough money now to start thinking about a move out come mid August.
I found this check in template back from early 2013, when I was a lot more responsible about my mental health:
On a scale of 1 to 10 (1 = serious problem, 10 = not a problem), rate the following:
Emotional Health: 8
Physical Depression Symptoms: 9
Physical Anxiety Symptoms: 10
Racing Thoughts: 10
Depressed Thoughts: 9
Paranoia / Fear / Anxiety: 10
Outlook / Hope: 9