Forging a new path is sometimes a bit tricky. It’s not always a straight shot to the goal. It’s a series of well-timed ricochets, catalyzing an outcome of unforeseen prospects. It’s rarely a predictable course to the landmarks. They materialize along the way at unsuspecting junctures. Thus is the course of life; deciding events with a voracious randomness that flirts with disaster. We’re never truly spared from its dealings. All that can be done is to strive and survive. And prevail we must, against whatever circumstance arises. I’m competent enough to process the odds. So far, I’d say things have been headed upward. Especially meeting Megan. I begin to wonder if my limited interactions are going to amount to much impact. But what can I do but show an abundance of enthusiasm to engage? I’m trying my best to have a positive influence. Or earn some limited recognition. My intentions are pretty clear. I’m looking for something. So is she, presumably.
I guess these limited interactions are as good as I can expect. And I should be grateful for the time I already have been given. All of this has been a benefit to me. Even if it were to all suddenly evaporate away. You never know what kinds of things will happen in life. Things change at a moments notice, and for no discernible reason even. We just smile. And move along.
This is not the way I want things to go here. I don’t see that happening. But then again.
The thinker waits for the next move, even if that move takes its sweet time in getting there. I’ve had conversations just stop. It would be disappointing, but not the last act of the play. My show must go on. And I’m willing to try nevertheless. I wrote an email, and extended my appreciation for the gift of conversation. It’s about all I can control. I guess it has me a little down that such a good thing could just abruptly cease, but that’s not unfamiliar territory for me. I’m used to having to pick up the pieces after a break. I just don’t want to be doing do again do soon.