The Time Capsule

Permanently attached to the menu of my blog is a very neat little document. It’s about as old as any sequence of words I have come to create. It began 16 years ago when I was much, much different. It was originally a WordPerfect document, was then converted to a .doc file, and has been preserved ever since. It’s survived dozens of computer transfers, dead hard drives, and has prevailed in the test of time. I took the contents of that file and posted it in the blog. Since this file began, I have promised to follow the rule: whenever you find it for the first time in a long time, add an entry, and see how many times You can do that. And so it has endured to this day. Ultimately, It is a testament to the kind of person I am. I have had so many changes in my life, and all those names are a kaleidoscope of my transitioning identity. I am a person in flux. A mentally ill male who has this record keeper to put my disorder into perspective: a lifelong story detailing more than half of my reality as a fractured, changing, evolving individual. I know to you this document doesn’t have any of the memory of having kept it for so long that I possess. I KNOW I didn’t just create those words in 2012 (when the blog was started) like it would seem to you. I remember a time when it was down to being on 2 flash drives. It came so close to being totally erased on several occasions. There’s no way I can convince you of the truth. I have no way to prove it. Other than to hope that after making THIS FAR down the post you would probably think I was being straight with you. I stand to gain nothing by deceiving. And besides, you can tell by my enthusiasm that I’m proud I’ve had it for so long. It’s really quite amazing. It’s not much, but it has been with me through it all, and there are very few things in my world that can say that.

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