Stuffy

Well I’m mostly better. Maybe like 20% sick still. But I’m getting through it. My weekend has been lonesome, as you are aware. I’ve had plenty of chances to feel down, but I haven’t committed to sadness, or chosen a road that would lead to it. I find myself in a contemplative state, reflecting on my thoughts and amusing myself with distractions. I’ve been in my snugly jammies all day, and have no intention of getting out of them until bedtime. I do wish I was not sick so that I might have been able to do some activities, but I had been booked solid every weekend for the last month. It’s about time I had a break.

The time alone has been refreshing. I was able to watch football uninterrupted for hours with no one to entertain or have demands made of me. No obligations, no rules. Not that I have a desire to go do anything crazy: a wild time for me looks more like cereal for lunch. I have enjoyed being here and the silence of solitude. I especially enjoy that my idle thoughts are not deliberately destructive, as they have been in similar situations. Today was another example of how things are improving for me mentally. I put myself to the test, and I passed.

I know I’m going to be fine for work tomorrow. No question. I look forward to yet another eventful week, in which I will be successful. Nothing but my stuffy nose is holding me back. And that is a temporary situation. I think I will be up for a while watching tv and trying to normalize my sleep schedule again. If only coffee would have some sway on my level of alertness. It has long since lost its potency in this regard. Oh well. I baked some more chicken and will probably eat that for dinner. How boring. But this is my life. It’s not a carnival. Keep me in a set routine and I’ll be content. I yearn for patterns.

I hope you have a nice night blog. Take care.

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5 thoughts on “Stuffy

    • Thanks for the comment. It’s been hard for me going from always having someone there with me, to being ok just hanging with myself. There’s a special kind of tranquility in solitude. I even catch myself talking out loud even though I know no one can hear me. Maybe that’s me being a little crazy though. Hehe.

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