Every week, Amanda and I designate a day where we do not spend any time together, to nurture our own independent selves. I think this is novel and healthy, but do sometimes struggle when left completely alone. I can occasionally get very anxious and that can cause me to spiral down.
It has been a challenge for me to be alone and be ok with it. I tend to want to be constantly stimulated, or thoroughly distracted. But I can’t always do that; I still need to be able to maintain sanity and equilibrium. Today is a real big test for me. I spent only a few brief moments with my parents and the rest of it has been up to me to do with as I see fit.
At this juncture, I’m thinking I’m just going to get all comfortable in my bed and listen to the baseball game and relax my evening away. I like being in my sheets, even if I’m not ready to go to sleep. My bed is ridiculously comfortable, and a generally good place to hang out. I’m done with my responsibilities today and just want to get snuggy.
I was able to have a day to myself and not have it be a bad thing at all. I have been behaving normally and not losing any ground to negative thoughts. Today has been a good day.