I have been establishing success at a new, unprecedented level in my life. I’m in a stable relationship and have constructed a life that satasfies me thoroughly. It’s not an easy road, and I must work hard every day to stay on top of my responsibilities.
I missed my night meds last Saturday night, and it really messed me up the next morning. I had shivers and hot flashes, clammy skin, muscle spasms, nausea and anxiety. Not doing that again. We nearly had to cancel our fishing trip we had planned but once my morning meds were metabolized I was fine.
Amanda and I have been cruising along uninhibited for almost five months, and we have yet to fight about anything, or even fundamentally disagree about an issue. We have had several conversations where a problem was discussed and worked-through with logic and reasoning over the course of a civil discourse. It’s such a dramatic change from the norm that I hardly know what to do with myself sometimes. She just consistently makes me happy, and the life I have with her is the best one I’ve yet to make for myself.
Today was therapy. I got some chores done around the house and was there at the clinic a good 40 minutes before my session, despite having tried to stall myself with projects. Jax was also early for her afternoon appointment and we were alone together in the waiting room. At first, I thought that it could only be a bad thing, but then I got to wondering how anything that could happen in the waiting room could have any impact on my life whatsoever? There’s no harm in being friendly with someone you used to love, especially in light of all the trauma there is to dig up there. Why not set a positive tone for the undecided future? Hanging on to negative feelings from my past is not something I care to do anymore. So we conversed and she caught me up on the various changes in her life. She seems happy and healthy, which is really great. I don’t wish any calamity upon her or anyone for that matter. Anyway, it could have been a bad thing, but it wasn’t.
We moved my therapy to once a month, because I’m stable and being a good steward of my mental health. It’s not necessary to get too deep into my life, because there isn’t anything wrong with it. I’m doing fine, and that’s all well and good, but not productive for introspective therapy. I summarize events for Margaret now, and list the productive events of my life. Margaret has better things to do than listen to me natter on about how happy I am. I started playing WoW again, and sometimes Amanda and I quest together. It’s fun.
Another uplifting check in. One of many more to come.