Coming back from a busy weekend can be hard, especially when I’m stressing about fantasy football (in this instance, anyway). I needed some time to diffuse from both the boss visit and the boy, and I didn’t really get it. I know at times like this I need to prove to myself I can handle my workload and not crack, but I did bend. I took my work home with me today, and that was sort of a compromise. I was still productive, but I got the chance to be in a better environment. I got some sagely advice on how to compose myself as well. Signs are pointing up.
I am at a loss for complex thoughts today blog. I feel jumbled up. Lost. In transition with no clear objective. I do believe this is temporary. I got back to my discipline today after letting it go all weekend and most of last week. I knew I couldn’t handle doing everything I wanted to do, so instead of push myself and burn out, I incrementalized my energy. Worked out ok.
Amanda has been going through some things. Her moods have been running on high-octane anxiety and obsession, which I am largely unable to do anything about. I try to help, but I feel useless. We have good talks, but there is still some interference in our communications. I’m not sure what to call it. Sometimes, were just disconnected. This is me being overly-analytic. We are just two people who are different and we do the b st we can. Our relationship got started because of how we communicate to each other. We are very good, but there’s always the issue of time and trust. Once I’ve been a fixture for a while, I think we will blend even better than we already do.
I hope this week works out better than last. I felt good, but the exhaustion was out of control. I need less toxic stress.
Mellow. Breathe. Shhhhhhh.