Firstly, I’m a jerk and an idiot. I should know better than to put C is a tough spot between things of rock-like nature. I’m regretful about my brutish oversharing and I need to reconcile that. I think this has been inconsiderate of me and I have thoughts on how I can demonstrate a healthier pattern. I just get swept away with my emotional spikes sometimes. It’s hard to catch and regulate, but I have.

In Whammy Slammy Susan 2, I’m satisfactorily enjoying a healthy lead after just two days AGAINST the DerpyDerpDerp team that I hate so much. With any luck that holds up and I finally hand that bastard a loss. We shall see.

But seriously brain, we need to focus. There is so much more to life than these moments, than these sensations which should not be allowed to dictate action. Consideration and true understanding are things I need to work on. C is such a rare person… I don’t want to fuck this up because my feelings are calling the shots. Life is a meandering journey and I need to learn not to demand of it but enjoy it for what it is. I still have so much to learn…

I did reach out and apologize. I feel better having done so because I regret my actions and words. I can only learn, adjust and adapt to better fit my new and ever-changing environment.